Live YOUR Life According To YOUR Standards

I’m still learning this today, that what you allow and how you encourage others to treat you will always have an impact on the life you live. Words are just words. They may hurt, but we have to live our lives according to our standards. When we are broken, we often try to search for comfort in the arms and words of others. If we continue to seek solace and expect to be fixed by the hands of another, we will be left disappointed.

Life is too short to be unhappy and be living in the shadow of others. We are all set to accomplish things according to our own timelines. It is easy to compare ourselves to the person next to us and see what they have and what we do not. This is one of the many downfalls of the human race. Jealousy is a monster and many people have it. When we leave this world, all of those materialistic items will not matter. We take the memories. Which I want to make more of. So live your life because tomorrow is not guaranteed.

I am going to be 25 this year, and I feel like there is still so much I have yet to do. Places I want to visit, food I want to taste, music I want to listen to, art I want to see, nature I want to explore, languages I want to learn. I want to experience life for all the beauty it has to offer. My deepest fear is looking back on my life when I’m older and realizing I lived by everyone else’s standards.

I have struggled with making others happy and not focusing on what I truly want. I have grown up hearing, “You need to do this, you need to do that,” and what about me? What about what I want? I live in a different generation than my parents, their parents, and the parents before them. Our 20’s are the years to explore, find ourselves, and establish our identity. I do not want to rush. I do not want to start a career I loathe or live in a place I am miserable living in. I know too many people in their 30’s and 40’s even who do not like the situation they are in. I am sick and tired of hearing I need to have my entire life figured out at 24. I am tired of people telling me I am not good enough or I need to do more. I have accomplished a lot for my 24 years and I should be proud of myself. I should not seek happiness, validation, or approval from anyone. I will always be miserable if that is the case. I cannot continue to spend my 20’s worried about the opinions of others, what they think of me, or their critiques of my life choices. If I continue to allow people to structure my decisions and keep allowing them to influence my life and not for the better, I will not truly live. People will always have something to say, so let them say it. Do not allow others to hold you back from what you want. Go out and get it, period. And stay to yourself. Work in silence.

Sometimes you just need to be your own savior. Be able to feel whole entirely on your own. If you have made it this far on your own, you can certainly keep going. It may be hard, but the more you experience, the stronger you become. It builds a warrior; a survivor.

Be your own biggest fan. Celebrate your success. But also celebrate your failures. This is when we truly learn; when we truly grow. Things will fall into place as they are meant to. Do not rush the process and have faith you will accomplish anything you set your mind to if you are wiling to put in the time and effort.

Living a mediocre life is not what I plan to do. I plan to make it extraordinary.

Photo by Victor Freitas on

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Ms. Dakota, is a current graduate student and soon to be elementary education teacher. She is a multi-genre writer who explores the world of creative non-fiction, poetry, and fiction. You can find her on twitter: @msdakotawrites.

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